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A little bit about today + dark fangirl thoughts
Sunday, 29 December 2019 19:56I've been watching chess (rapid and blitz chess world championships) for four days straight. Well, I was smart enough to take a few breaks from watching during the past few days, but today I watched more or less all the matches that were shown on TV. The result? Massive media over-exposure, mild dizziness and tiredness even when I wanted to go and relax and do other things. Even now, I don't feel able to focus on anything, so my writing/reading tracker spreadsheet for 2020 is not going to get completed today.
Yes, I know I'm a fool for doing this to myself, but sometimes it's just hard to balance the need/interest in sports with the need for rest and detachment.
I slept through much of the Tour de Ski sprint, though. But yes, I'm happy about Lampič' win, and maybe a bit less happy about Johannes being amazing, as he is. I wrote a little bit about him elsewhere yesterday, so I'm just going to copy it here. It's mostly just stupid, selfish fan feelings about him, though, so feel free to skip if you're not interested in me being a bit sad and maybe a bit mean, too:
There, I said it. (But, to be fair, these feelings might have been there since Seefeld 2019, really)
Yes, I know I'm a fool for doing this to myself, but sometimes it's just hard to balance the need/interest in sports with the need for rest and detachment.
I slept through much of the Tour de Ski sprint, though. But yes, I'm happy about Lampič' win, and maybe a bit less happy about Johannes being amazing, as he is. I wrote a little bit about him elsewhere yesterday, so I'm just going to copy it here. It's mostly just stupid, selfish fan feelings about him, though, so feel free to skip if you're not interested in me being a bit sad and maybe a bit mean, too:
I went from being a massive JHK fan ever since the beginning of his career to rooting for nearly anyone BUT him. It’s so sad. I miss my fan feelings. I miss the joy I used to feel about him, I miss wanting the best for him in every race. And most of all, I miss his normal boy attitude, because that was what I fell in love with. I guess the changes we’ve seen especially during this year (but also partly over the course of last season) are natural for many reasons - firstly, he’s getting older and more mature, and secondly, he’s the biggest current star of his sport, AND from a country where this sport matters more than nearly anything else. It’s not surprising that he has become more aware of his public persona by now. Maybe this is not a bad thing for himself and his own well-being in the middle of everything he has to deal with, but as a fan it’s hard to see, and it’s a process of falling out of love with someone I still wish I cared about in the same way.
I know these are selfish fan feelings, and maybe I understand that this is a natural development of things. It’s sad, though. As things are now, I have to admit that I support Chicco and Sergey and even Sanya more than him - in that order of importance.
There, I said it. (But, to be fair, these feelings might have been there since Seefeld 2019, really)